![]() How friggin' awesome would that be? / Granted we almost look EXACTLY alike. That Guy: (chuckle) Well, isn't it obvious? (pause) It's Mr. Narrator: Who shall be your successor should you ever have a need to stop doing "Ask That Guy With The Glasses"? That Guy: (with eyebrows raised and lips quivering, he fakes crying, emulating Renee Zellweger in Jerry Maguire) You had me at "is"! (after a few seconds, he turns his head and bites his right index finger as he's holding his pipe) who slept with just about every man who can say the letter "r". And not just a lady, an unbelievable whore. Shaving your head and painting it like Ralph from The Simpsons isn't going to convince us anymore. That Guy: (pipe in mouth and turn) Boy George. ![]() Narrator: When people say, "That's what she said!", who are they talking about? (quick Spanish guitar flourish plays as That Guy poses the way a Spanish dancer would back to normal music) How? It is the mystery of The Guy With The Glasses. (leans in to the camera) This is the price you pay for animated magic. and becomes non-functioning for several hours. Oh yes, Disney has their own language! / And when you speak it, your genitalia cries. And that's why the literal translation for tofu is actually "squashed lemming." / In fact, it's not even Asian. That Guy: (pipe in mouth, turns and chuckles) It's not made out of people it's made out of lemmings! / You know how lemmings are always jumping off cliffs because they're totally insane? / Well, they don't! That was just a lie the Disney Corporation made up to fool you! / You see, for their nature programs, they actually took the little lemmings and just threw them off a cliff! Just for yuks! / And the lemmings were saying, "Do-do I really jump off a cliff?: And the Disney people said, "Yes, you DO!" (imitates throwing a lemming off a cliff, along with the "lemming" screaming) / And the Disney people looked around and said, "What are we gonna do with all these dead lemmings?" (pause) Tofu. What can I do to solve this little problem of mine? Narrator: I am absolutely terrified of tofu it's made of people, you know. That Guy: (facing screen left with pipe in mouth, he turns to the camera and takes it out) That's a very good question, but I think the REAL question is: How come YOU (points pipe at camera) still don't have your Christmas decorations up? Narrator (always off-screen, his questions appear on-screen unless noted): Why do you still have your Christmas decorations up? Traditional introduction and piano music. Greetings and welcome to Ask That Guy With The Glasses. That Guy: Oh! (closes his book) The South shall rise again! Didn't hear you come in. We are also partial to the name, World War IV.Ask That Guy Episode 47 (February 2nd, 2010) In fact, the word "lemming" comes from the Norwegian "lemmus" which means destruction.Īre there any up-and-coming death metal bands in our reader-base? Feel free to use the name. Lemmings can be fierce little buggers, bearing their teeth when approached and decimating entire sections of countryside of vegetation. They might look cute, but they do not have a reputation for cuddliness. They are often be so focused on moving forward in a frenzied rate, that they can plunge straight off of embankments, as seen in this video. Instead, overpopulation and density triggers a migration reaction in the little rodents, causing a frantic and single-minded migration across long distances in search of greener pastures. While they sometimes do fall to their deaths, they are not consciously committing suicide. One popular myth about lemmings is that they react to overpopulation by leaping off of cliffs to their death. Though the little rodents (Norway lemmings, Lemus lemus) have not yet begun swarming in a locust-like frenzy, they have been turning up all over Lapland, including drowned in the nets of salmon fishermen, clinging to the oar of a rower and attached to a woman's ankle as it bit her. Northern Finland is experiencing its largest lemming migration in 20 years, according to t his article in Helsingin Sanomat's "International Edition" (we never miss an issue!).
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